Jacob.

My little baby is a year and a half. 

Which really makes him not so much of a baby anymore.

I'm refusing to call him a toddler, he's still a baby.

He had his 18 month check up and he's healthy as can be.

He's right on track with all his milestones and the doctor has no worries.

He's talking up a storm and each day he seems to acquire a new word.

My favorite thing he says right now is, "I pilled" (spilled), in this high little questioning voice.

Sometimes he speaks in full babbling sentences and looks at us like we should know exactly what he is saying.

Other times he speaks so clearly I almost think it's Ethan.

Oh and the animation.

When he says something is yucky, he pulls his arm all the way back and does a full sweeping motion across his chest while saying, "ackey" in the deepest most disgusted voice possible.

Another favorite of mine.

His big blue eyes make me melt and sometimes it's so hard to be stern with him.

(I'm actually a bit of a softy when it comes to both boys.)

He's adventurous and nearly gives me a heart attack each day with his dare devilish ways.

He likes his trucks and cars, and prefers to be outside.

He enjoys going for bike rides around the block and watching Wall-E.

He seriously could watch it 5 times a day if we let him.

He's determined and strong, and can put up a good fight.

He's becoming more independent and opinionated each day.

I so love this boy.

Jacob {in action}.

I can't believe how much Jacob is changing every day. 

I have not taken much video of him, which I really should. 

I swore I would never be that mom to have less photos and video of the second kid. I'm trying. 

Here is some of what he can say these days. 

Oh and he can flex his muscles.

He had just finished dinner which explains the mess. 

Every day he says something new and he's communicating with us more and more.

It really is amazing to watch him learn and soak it all in.

He has also become quite the helper.

He needs to have something to do at all times.

He's not one for sitting and reading a book. He's on the move all day so I try to come up with as much for him to do as possible.

He really likes to help with the laundry, especially loading the dryer and it doesn't matter if the clothes are dirty, clean, wet or dry.

So that's our little man as of today.

Full of energy, excitement, giggles and mischief.

Oh how I love him so.

How He Rolls.

Because he's cool like that.

Jacob's 1st Birthday Party.

I finally am getting the chance to post photos of Jacob's 1st birthday.

It's only been a week so that's not too bad, right?

It was a fantastic party, so much fun, good food, and I was stress free. 

I'm never stress free for a party and boy does it make a difference.

Come the morning of the party I seriously had no worries.

Which secretly made me a tiny nervous because parties equal stress, right? 

Anyway everything went wonderfully, except that I forgot to take a lot of pictures. Opps. 

So I have no pictures of the fabulous cupcakes my sister made. 

I'm really sad about that. I guess we'll just have to make them again and takes some photos. 

Oh bummer. 

On to the details...

I had so much fun creating all the decorations thanks to DimplePrints.

I loved being able to print out what I needed and create my own decorations.

I was super excited when I found these popcorn bins at the dollar tree. I knew they were just what I needed.

Since we had the carnival theme going we set up a few games for the "bigger" kids.

We had some yummy treats to start,

and an even better lunch.

(Costco pizza is the way to go. Cheap, easy, and so good.)

Everyone had a great time eating, playing, and enjoying the day.

My favorite part of the day was the cake. 

For me, it's always the best part of the 1st birthday.

Jacob was slow to start, surprisingly, but once he had a taste he dove right in.

Such a messy, sugary little guy.

At some point the kids, big and small, got a little crazy with the face paint.

This is my favorite picture of him ever.

And lastly, the books!

Remember how we collected books for The Joyful Life Library?

Well we received 59 in all!!

Awesome!

Thank you everyone!

We had a wonderful 1st birthday for our little guy.

I can hardly believe a year has already come and gone.

I love you little Jacob.

Happy Birthday!

Happy Birthday Jacob.

I love you so, oh don't you know.

Spaghetti.

It's oh so good.

 And oh so messy.

 But so much fun.

Slowing Down.

Tonight I had no plans for dinner. 

I'm usually prepared but I didn't want to make what I had planned, so Brett and I thought we'd just order out.

I got to thinking about the money we would spend and I quickly didn't want take out.

I searched through the pantry and fridge and decided we'd make some burritos...grilled chicken, black beans, rice, cheese, avocado, and salsa. Yum!

I'm sorry I didn't take a picture of one of them (yes I had two), but you'd just be drooling right now, so I actually did you a favor.

Anyway, Ethan really wanted to eat outside at his new table I purchased today, so we headed out back.

We eat outside a lot, nothing new here.

Brett pulled Jacob's highchair outside and I got the boys their plates of food ready, again nothing out of the ordinary. 

I gave Ethan his plate, Brett started giving Jacob some of his food and I sat down to eat my dinner.

I looked over at Jacob shoveling food in his mouth and then it hit me...Jacob's not a little baby anymore. 

He's sitting in his big highchair, feeding himself little bits of cheese and black beans and avocado. 

When did this happen? 

Where have nine months gone?

When and how did my little baby turn into this little guy?

Time is flying by so quickly and I often forget to stop and take it in.

I forget to look around me, snap a photo, say thank you to God, and remember.

I need to more often because time is moving and I have no way of stopping it.

I need to slow down.

I'm so glad we didn't get take out tonight.

We probably would not have eaten outside, my littlest would not have been a huge mess, and I would have missed another moment that I would never get back.

I'm linking up here...

4am.

I don't like getting woken up at 4am.

I think most people would agree.

I saw a lot of the 4am hour during the first 6 months of Jacob's little life. 

Jacob would wake up for the 2nd or 3rd time on any given night and I would be angry.

More than angry.

I would sometimes just lay there wishing he would just fall back asleep, trying to ignore the crying.

Sometimes I would throw the covers off of me, stomp out of bed and say a few words I would rather not repeat.

I was tired and worn out.

About 2 months ago we decided to let him cry it out.

Hard decision but well worth it in the end.

Ever since that day he has fallen asleep on his own.

No rocking, no swaying, no cuddling, no light patting on the bottom.

We just sing a little song, kiss him on the head, lay him down and he falls asleep.

It's quite wonderful.

Except that I miss cuddling with him.

Jacob's never really been very cuddly but he would let me rock him to sleep, most of the time.

After hours of crying and screaming he would fall asleep in my arms and snuggle up against me.

I would be so grateful he finally had fallen asleep and was quiet that I would lie him down and go about the day, not thinking twice about it.

But now I miss it.

Last night he woke up crying. Usually I can give him a pacifier, turn on some music and he's out again within minutes, but not last night.

I was annoyed.

I wanted to go back to sleep. I was tired.

I took him out of the crib and starting rocking him in the chair.

As he was looking up at me and slowly falling back to sleep I realized it had been so long since I had put him to sleep this way.

I instantly had a change of heart.

Until that moment I hadn't realized I missed rocking my little boy so much.

I smiled down at him, sang softly and rubbed his little head. 

He fell asleep about 5 minutes later but I couldn't stop rocking him. 

We sat there for another 10 minutes before I laid him down.

 

Time is going by so fast and I often forget to slow down and enjoy tender moments with Brett and the boys. 

Last night was a reminder, even at 4am.

Blue Eyes.

Don't they just make you melt?

155 Days Ago.

155 days ago, approximately six months ago, at around six o'clock at night, I was standing in my kitchen making macaroni and cheese for Ethan.

Not long before then I was at my OB's office. She told me I was dilated to 4 and I would be having my baby any time now.

So as I was making macaroni and cheese I started having contractions. I ignored them and continued making Ethan's dinner.

When Brett walked into the kitchen and saw me standing there with my head on the counter, taking deep breaths, he insisted that I sit down.

I kept making dinner.

I was in denial and truly thought I was not having my second baby, at least not that day.

In just 2 short hours my contractions were only 3 minutes apart and we were off to the hospital, and I was still in denial.

Within minutes of being at the hospital my contractions were a minute apart and I was being wheeled into the delivery room.

As the pain was getting worse and worse, it suddenly hit me, "Oh crap. We're having another baby. I'm actually going to give birth to a baby boy in a few hours. We are going to have two boys. We are responsible for two little people."

My entire pregnancy had gone by so quickly since I was taking care of Ethan, working, cleaning, playing, and just plain living, that I forgot to think about the end result.

I mean I thought about it but I didn't really think about.

So it hit me. I was having another baby.

I started to feel nervous, anxious, excited, sad, happy…all the things that I'm most certain every woman about to give birth feels.

Then ten hours later, we met Jacob Nathan.

When I saw him all my fears and anxiety melted away.

I was in love. Again.

In just the few short six months he has been here our life has changed dramatically.

Some days have been the best I have ever had. Some days have been the worst I have ever had.

I wouldn't change any of it.

I love him tremendously. I love the dynamic that he adds to our family. I love his little face, his little hands, his little scrunched up nose. I love every bit of him.

I'm so very grateful for what took place 155 days ago.

 

Up Close: Jacob.

I could just eat him up.