For the last couple of days I've been having my own little pity party.
I'm tired, cranky, my house is a mess, I don't know the last time I washed my hair, I want to wear my regular jeans, I want my old schedule back. I've been mean to Brett for no real good reason and my patience has been short with Ethan on a few occasions.
I hear myself complaining and know that I am being foolish, but the words just keep coming out.
I know my little pity party has a lot to do with the hormones raging through my body right now and my lack of sleep. But to be honest, it's unacceptable. I'm only making myself feel worse.
And then today I watched Oprah.
I actually think God wanted me to watch Oprah, yes, silly as that may sound.
I'm not really a huge fan of Oprah, she scares me a little, but I sometimes will watch her show.
Earlier in the week I had seen the previews for her Friday show and I was interested. She was giving away ultimate dreams to deserving people and announcing the next book for her book club.
I was most interested in the book announcement.
When Friday came around I forgot to watch and didn't really think twice about it.
Then last night when I was feeding Jacob around midnight I remembered that her show is run again at 1:30 in the morning.
I decided to record it.
(Trust me, this is leading somewhere)
So today while Brett and Ethan were outside and I was giving Jacob a bottle I decided to watch the show.
Her first guest was a woman that I will never forget.
A few years ago she went into the hospital to give birth to her second child. Everything was seemingly fine. She gave birth to a healthy baby girl, but unfortunately she had developed a flesh eating disease and the only way to save her life was by amputating both of her legs and arms.
Over the next few years she had to learn how to care for herself, her daughters, and husband, all while trying to maneuver around a small cramped apartment that was not handicap accessible.
To top it off, her husband had recently lost his job and was having a hard time finding work.
And this woman has a good attitude about life everyday. She has made due with what she has been giving and she has a smile on her face.
As I sat there watching, and crying of course, I felt so ashamed of myself and my sad little pity party.
I have a house, a husband with a job, two healthy children, and for cryin' out loud all of my limbs.
And I'm feeling sorry for myself because I haven't taken a shower and I want some more sleep.
I was being ridiculous. I was being selfish. I was taking everything I have for granted.
I instantly changed my attitude. I stopped feeling sorry for myself. I prayed. I instantly felt lighter.
My problems are not really problems at all. God has given me and my family so much to be grateful for.
I won't forget that woman and I hope the next time I'm having a little pity party, which will happen again I'm sure, she will pop into my mind and I will thank the Lord for what he has given me.
3 comments:
Oh, sweet Adie!!! I'm thankful that you're thankful!! I'm happy to be your Mama!!
This is a great post! I definitely don't think you should feel silly or anything for having a lil pity party. Your life has changed significantly in the last month and the combination of no sleep+hormones could make the sanest go crazy. The only problem would have been if you had let your pity party turn into a full-blown pity parade, lasting for weeks or months. BUT, you were able to gain some perspective by hearing someone else's story. Not everyone can snap out of a funk that easily. So, in conclusion, I think you're great. I'm glad you've had those realizations because you and brett and boys are just the best!
Mimi said---
Brett, Adrian, Ethan and Jacob are so special and beautiful to us! We love you beyond words!!!!
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